Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘internet’

Peaceful by Ann Marquette

Peaceful by Ann Marquette

You can read this here, but please click this link to visit Jane’s blog directly and make all comments there.  Thank you for stopping by.

http://janefriedman.com/2015/01/19/10-resolutions-saner-internet/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+JaneFriedman+%28Jane+Friedman%29

For me, the hardest thing about being online is remaining focused on creative endeavors important to me. The multiplicity of voices—and the community that you care about—can make you forget your center. You get sucked into other agendas that could be worthy, but are never what you intended to get mixed up in. Sometimes, it’s hard not to play. You love the networks you’re a part of. You want to connect and contribute. You want to pay it forward.

But then it becomes hard to extricate yourself. You react and sometimes let it dictate your schedule. More and more often, you look up and realize that nothing you’ve been doing for the past few hours (or days or weeks!) much related to the underlying purpose you have for your own creative work.

There is so much to do, so much to participate in, so much to respond to—so many opportunities. It is a double-edged sword. Who doesn’t want more opportunities? But when the online community starts writing your to-do list, what happens to your own vision?

I’m not necessarily better at dealing with this than anyone else. I have periods of discipline, and then I don’t. I often gain back my discipline when I have moments away—to allow my own perspective to return. Some of the things I try to do:

  • Focus on reading or creative work first thing in the morning, for 3-6 hour stretches.
  • Stay off email for 8-12 hour periods—sometimes 24 hours.
  • Stay offline after dinner.

Sometimes I feel guilty about these things. What if students, colleagues, or clients need a response quickly? Is it OK to disappear for a full business day? I try to tell myself: Yes. And to also set others’ expectations so I don’t feel guilty.

All of this is a long prelude to 10 resolutions put forth by L.L. Barkat at Tweetspeak Poetry, as part of a movement called “Citizens for a Saner Internet—and Life.” Consider me one such citizen; want to join me?

10 Resolutions from Citizens for a Saner Internet—and Life

  1. Consider sharing three beautiful posts for every negative post we feel we must share.
  2. Share angry posts only if they significantly contribute to an important conversation.
  3. Understand anger as important, a red flag type emotion, that loses its strength if all we ever do is feel angry.
  4. Write headlines that are intelligent, witty, or intriguing without exhausting our readers by frequently playing the “outrage card” to get click-throughs.
  5. If we feel we want to listen to an angry Internet conversation for what it may be able to teach us about a subject, we resolve to do so silently for a “waiting period,” in a stance of learning rather than one of defense and counterattack.
  6. We will not link to attack journalism from our websites, so as not to give more power to the writer or website of said journalism. Related, we will not link to or re-share iterative journalism, which is a sloppy form of journalism designed to deliver a “scoop” that may have no foundation yet in truth.
  7. Consider ways to move beyond the “page view model” of Internet sustainability (which is one reason attack or sensationalist journalism is often pursued by individuals and websites, because it can result in high page views, which can translate into staying financially sustainable).
  8. Get offline for periods of rest—optimally, one offline day a week and getting offline by a certain cutoff time in the evenings—and use this time to cultivate face-to-face relationships, read, exercise, or otherwise interact with the world around us.
  9. If we are unsure about our own angry or sensationalistic post on a subject, we will first pass the post by trusted friends who come from different viewpoints, in a more private setting, before deciding whether to hit the publish button.
  10. If we have been online for hours and are finally simply “surfing” because we feel lonely or unfocused, we will get offline and spend time with people face-to-face, read, exercise, play, or delve deeply into a new interest area—one that will seriously challenge us and open up new avenues for our learning and our lives.

Sometimes, anger isn’t as much the issue (for me) as feeling buffeted by the concerns, egos, and ambitions that can be baked into social media interaction—where our moods and attitudes can be influenced who’s following, liking, responding, or connecting … or by who’s getting recognition or not … or by who’s agreeing or participating or not. Getting stuck in that thought pattern is a sure sign you’ve lost focus and probably control over what you’re trying to accomplish.

All that aside: I tend to have a bigger problem dealing with email distractions than social media distractions. Social media is easy to compartmentalize when needed; I’m still working on that with email.

As Laura says at her original post, feel free to take the 10 resolutions above and publish them on your blog. The resolutions are a community thing, and they belong to you if you want them to.

Read Full Post »

Vector image of two human figures with hands i...

Image via Wikipedia

A story a few years ago about being connected got me thinking. These are my thoughts, observations, and feelings about being connected.

When I was a child in Michigan people came and went in each others homes. Neighbors knew each other, spent time with each other, kept an eye on each others children and it was acceptable to discipline someone else’s child. These days there are rare places where people feel safe leaving their doors unlocked. Most parents don’t want their children corrected by someone else even if it means their safety. Neighbors rarely even know each others names let alone have any conversation or socializing,

Many people, maybe even most, have built up walls, invisible boundaries around themselves even within their friendships. Some people are open to their friends just dropping by to say hello, maybe have a cup of coffee and chat, but those friends never have the time, or more likely don’t take the time for such visits. Everyone is too busy with busy stuff these days to truly nurture their relationships with family and friends. Now people are wrapped up in their own worlds. Mind you, I am not talking about people who I know have REALLY busy lives, especially if they have lots of children. The other problem is, we get so tired and stressed with things we have to deal with in this life that we relish quiet down time.

So, how do we connect at all these days? Who do we connect with…and why? I read a piece where the author talked about connecting, being “connected.” He talked about the human need to be connected, even if only through the internet! I am going to say “Oh yes.”

Isn’t it interesting that I use the word “talk” when referring to an editor’s article about being connected? But isn’t that what it’s about? Connecting is a conversation between people…whether it is speaking with your mouth, or via the written words.

For many people, the internet – emails, instant messaging, blogs, and tweets are the main sources for shut-ins, lonely singles (old and young), people who just want to “be connected” somehow. It is also huge among those who are married. Many parents connect with other parents about issues with children, finances, entertainment, house remodeling, cooking, etc. The list goes on and on.

I can only truly speak for myself here, my thoughts and feelings about the desire to be connected.

I love to socialize, to communicate with others, to be connected. However, I am also joyful in drawing wonderful people into my life, and having the ability to let go of anyone who is negative, who has any tendency to make me feel less than joyful. I have been truly blessed, especially in the last few years to have many joyful spirits come into my life…whether temporarily or on a more permanent basis.

The greatest joy of each city I have lived in during my life, so far, are the relationships I’ve made. Even though I don’t live in those cities any longer, the friendships have held. Some of the communications may be scattered throughout the year, and a few may only be at Christmas and birthdays with updates on our lives…but they remain true.

Thank God for those who created the internet, for email, which allows friends, family, and acquaintances to keep in touch and up-to-date with each other.

My computer does not shout “you’ve got mail,” but you can be sure I love the sound it does make when one arrives in my IN box. Sad part of this is that we communicate with our nearby friends more by email that getting up off our behinds and walking down the street, or take a drive to meet each other someplace to have a face to face conversation. Yet, at least through the technology of our cell phones and computers it helps us to feel we are not alone. I think that is why so many people are constantly on their cell phones, so they can feel connected.

I found a small city in South Carolina, which is a perfect day trip from where I live, and not only does it have a beautiful small town feel to its downtown area, with a river running through it and a park at the river below the falls, but it has the consistently friendliest people to strangers I have ever met. It is a place I can go to walk, sit by the river and its little water fall, stop to visit a few friends I’ve made, get a coffee or bite to eat, be at peace and whether in conversation with someone or not I feel connected.

The greatest constant unconditional connection I do have is my relationship with God. He is always there to listen and he connects with me all day, everyday, through a variety of ways…the refreshing raindrops that touch me when it rains, the sun warming me and giving me light, a smile from someone, the sound of the birds singing, a waterfall, and so much more.

Being connected is important to all of us…may you all be blessed with an open heart, to being truly connected.

Read Full Post »

Being Connected

Vector image of two human figures with hands i...

Image via Wikipedia

A story a few years ago about being connected got me thinking. These are my thoughts, observations, and feelings about being connected.

When I was a child in Michigan people came and went in each others homes. Neighbors knew each other, spent time with each other, kept an eye on each others children and it was acceptable to discipline someone else’s child. These days there are rare places where people feel safe leaving their doors unlocked. Most parents don’t want their children corrected by someone else even if it means their safety. Neighbors rarely even know each others names let alone have any conversation or socializing,

Many people, maybe even most, have built up walls, invisible boundaries around themselves even within their friendships. Some people are open to their friends just dropping by to say hello, maybe have a cup of coffee and chat, but those friends never have the time, or more likely don’t take the time for such visits. Everyone is too busy with busy stuff these days to truly nurture their relationships with family and friends. Now people are wrapped up in their own worlds. Mind you, I am not talking about people who I know have REALLY busy lives, especially if they have lots of children. The other problem is, we get so tired and stressed with things we have to deal with in this life that we relish quiet down time.

So, how do we connect at all these days? Who do we connect with…and why? I read a piece where the author talked about connecting, being “connected.” He talked about the human need to be connected, even if only through the internet! I am going to say “Oh yes.”

Isn’t it interesting that I use the word “talk” when referring to an editor’s article about being connected? But isn’t that what it’s about? Connecting is a conversation between people…whether it is speaking with your mouth, or via the written words.

For many people, the internet – emails, instant messaging, blogs, and tweets are the main sources for shut-ins, lonely singles (old and young), people who just want to “be connected” somehow. It is also huge among those who are married. Many parents connect with other parents about issues with children, finances, entertainment, house remodeling, cooking, etc. The list goes on and on.

I can only truly speak for myself here, my thoughts and feelings about the desire to be connected.

I love to socialize, to communicate with others, to be connected. However, I am also joyful in drawing wonderful people into my life, and having the ability to let go of anyone who is negative, who has any tendency to make me feel less than joyful. I have been truly blessed, especially in the last few years to have many joyful spirits come into my life…whether temporarily or on a more permanent basis.

The greatest joy of each city I have lived in during my life, so far, are the relationships I’ve made. Even though I don’t live in those cities any longer, the friendships have held. Some of the communications may be scattered throughout the year, and a few may only be at Christmas and birthdays with updates on our lives…but they remain true.

Thank God for those who created the internet, for email, which allows friends, family, and acquaintances to keep in touch and up-to-date with each other.

My computer does not shout “you’ve got mail,” but you can be sure I love the sound it does make when one arrives in my IN box. Sad part of this is that we communicate with our nearby friends more by email that getting up off our behinds and walking down the street, or take a drive to meet each other someplace to have a face to face conversation. Yet, at least through the technology of our cell phones and computers it helps us to feel we are not alone. I think that is why so many people are constantly on their cell phones, so they can feel connected.

I found a small city in South Carolina, which is a perfect day trip from where I live, and not only does it have a beautiful small town feel to its downtown area, with a river running through it and a park at the river below the falls, but it has the consistently friendliest people to strangers I have ever met. It is a place I can go to walk, sit by the river and its little water fall, stop to visit a few friends I’ve made, get a coffee or bite to eat, be at peace and whether in conversation with someone or not I feel connected.

The greatest constant unconditional connection I do have is my relationship with God. He is always there to listen and he connects with me all day, everyday, through a variety of ways…the refreshing raindrops that touch me when it rains, the sun warming me and giving me light, a smile from someone, the sound of the birds singing, a waterfall, and so much more.

Being connected is important to all of us…may you all be blessed with an open heart, to being truly connected.

Read Full Post »

%d bloggers like this: