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Posts Tagged ‘Anger’

I write this as I look at myself, through my own lens.  Some who know me may say “Oh yes, you are that…judgmental.”  And sadly I will agree with you.  Recently the little voice inside told me I was doing that a lot, not as much verbally, but a lot mentally.  So I asked God to please forgive me all the times I have judged someone or a situation, and to help me stop.

I think about when the time comes and I stand before God, how will He judge me!  Thankfully I know He forgives me, and that brings me to Forgiveness.  It is so important that I continue to forgive others whether they actually hurt me, or the hurt is only imagined.

So, I have been practicing to stop the judgemental thinking at the start and I want to share the joys of becoming open minded.

One day while sitting in Barnes and Noble (BN Café) enjoying reading with a cup of coffee a man came struggling through between the tables.  He was a big man, heavyset, gray hair, goatee, about 5’ 4” and maybe in his 60’s. He was very shaky and unsteady even though using a cane.  He was very frustrated, even a bit angry as he mumbled “this is a death trap.”  He repeated same to a young man (maybe his son) who came a couple minutes later to get him.  Of course, my immediate mental reaction was that he was a grumpy old man!

I watched as the young man patiently helped him up and held the man’s hand as he struggled again to walk through the tables and chairs, then out of the store to their car which was right in front of the floor to ceiling wall of glass which allowed me to continue watching.  It took the man quite awhile to get himself into the car and I could see the pain and frustration on his face.  Suddenly my heart softened and I realized his difficulty was more the cause of his frustration and anger as it reduced his inability to be fully independent.   

Another day at BN Café, yes I come here a lot as my external office and people watching.  I love to sit at a table where lots of light comes in and do my reading and writing.  Anyway, as I sat peacefully doing my thing, a young man…well young compared to me these days (ha ha ha)…came in with his five children around the ages of 8 to 13 (my estimate).  He pulled together a few of the small tables and chairs.  As the children got settled in, Dad went to get two large Frappuccinos which they all shared.

Yes, the minute they came in and began sitting down I thought “Oh no, what kind of noise are they going to create to disturb my peace!”  Before you judge me, let me say that I love kids, unless they are undisciplined brats.  Actually it is not those children I don’t like, but the parents who allow them to be that way. I used to child sit for a family of five of the greatest kids who I just adore…three girls and two boys.

Again I caught myself and just watched.  They each took out a tablet, and the dad did the same.  I thought he was going to do some home schooling.  The children were quiet, soft spoken and well-mannered.  Each of them were busy doing something on their own pads and would show each other what they had done.  Turns out they were drawing pictures, and the Dad is actually a sketch artist along with his own marketing business.    They were a smiling, happy, peaceful and loving family…three girls and two boys.  Every once in awhile one of the younger girls with blond hair who was seated where she could see me would look over at me and smile.  Just watching this family warmed my heart, filled me with joy, and actually made my heart smile. Of course I smiled back.  I finally got up and asked the dad if I could take a picture of them, explaining what a joy it was for me to watch them.  He gave me his permission, and I emailed him the two photos I took.  Just watching them filled me with a peace and joy I can’t explain, and made my heart smile.

So, I am learning to not judge, but to leave my heart and spirit open to God’s amazing gifts.

If you have read this far, I thank you and hope you enjoyed.  If you have had similar experiences or have any other comments I would love to hear from you.

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let go
Image by her wings via Flickr

The first words I think of are pride, fear, hurt, anger, lack of courage.  Either one or more could be reason(s) for anyone to find it hard to forgive.  It is especially hard to forgive someone face to face.  Whether we do it in person, by letter, or deep within our heart,  it is important to forgive, not for the other person’s sake, but for our own.  It is important that we forgive with love in our heart, and once we do then we must also LET GO of any and all negative feelings about the issue.  It is amazing how free and peaceful it is after forgiving and Letting Go ~~

Time For Letting Go
by Ann Marquette

Anytime is a great time to give this gift, not only to the other person(s), but also to ourselves. Time for healing.

One of the most painful things we have to do in our lives is Letting Go.

Sometimes it is Letting Go of things…material things which mean a lot to us, because of sentimental value.

It may mean Letting Go of feelings. When we hold sadness inside, and try to mask it with only a show of happiness, it is better to feel the sadness so it washes through us then Let it Go. A good cry can be cleansing.

One of the best things to do in our lives is Letting Go of anger and hurt caused by others. We need to find it in our hearts to forgive lovingly. The anger and hurt we hold inside only poisons us, and causes us to allow that person or persons to control our feelings. I have heard of people who have been hurt far worse than I could ever imagine, yet they found it in their hearts to forgive, with love, and let go. They found freedom within that allowed them to soar like an eagle. I have found peace by forgiving others who have hurt me, and I pray they have found peace within themselves.

Sometimes, we have to let go of someone we care for very deeply when we realize that person does not care for us in the same way. Maybe it is best to leave them remembering us with whatever kind of feeling they do have for us. It may not be possible to hide our own deeper feelings for that person, which could make their life uncomfortable. Letting Go may be the best gift we can give them because they may realize how we feel, yet care enough not to want to hurt us.

Even when we know a relationship is not right, on both sides, or one person has a doubt about it, it is hard to let go of something that seems secure. We often accept less than the best because we can’t bear to let go.

There are occasions when we feel something wonderful for someone, but we don’t express it for fear of being rejected. Sometimes our feelings will be rejected. Yet, what if we withhold it from the one person who could very well be that One Special Someone in our lives and they too have been afraid to express their true feelings, or don’t even realize their true feelings yet! How sad that we may miss The Best for fear of Letting Go of the expression of those feelings.

Whatever the reason, or situation, it is never easy Letting Go.

©December 19, 2007

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Asking For ForgivenessChristmas is a great time to give this gift, not only to the other person(s), but also to ourselves. Time for healing.

One of the most painful things we have to do in our lives is Letting Go.

Sometimes it is Letting Go of things…material things which mean a lot to us, because of sentimental value.

It may mean Letting Go of feelings. When we hold sadness inside, and try to mask it with only a show of happiness, it is better to feel the sadness so it washes through us then Let it Go. A good cry can be cleansing.

One of the best things to do in our lives is Letting Go of anger and hurt caused by others. We need to find it in our hearts to forgive lovingly. The anger and hurt we hold inside only poisons us, and causes us to allow that person or persons to control our feelings. I have heard of people who have been hurt far worse than I could ever imagine, yet they found it in their hearts to forgive, with love, and let go. They found freedom within that allowed them to soar like an eagle. I have found peace by forgiving others who have hurt me, and I pray they have found peace within themselves.

Sometimes, we have to let go of someone we care for very deeply when we realize that person does not care for us in the same way. Maybe it is best to leave them remembering us with whatever kind of feeling they do have for us. It may not be possible to hide our own deeper feelings for that person, which could make their life uncomfortable. Letting Go may be the best gift we can give them because they may realize how we feel, yet care enough not to want to hurt us.

Even when we know a relationship is not right, on both sides, or one person has a doubt about it, it is hard to let go of something that seems secure. We often accept less than the best because we can’t bear to let go.

There are occasions when we feel something wonderful for someone, but we don’t express it for fear of being rejected. Sometimes our feelings will be rejected. Yet, what if we withhold it from the one person who could very well be that One Special Someone in our lives and they too have been afraid to express their true feelings, or don’t even realize their true feelings yet! How sad that we may miss The Best for fear of Letting Go of the expression of those feelings.

Whatever the reason, or situation, it is never easy Letting Go.

©December 19, 2007

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